Who am I?

“I” is the most illusionary word in the dictionary. We often use it to refer to things that do not exist, or to talk about things that are either less or more than the original. In other words, ‘I’ refers to falsified ego. If I have to tell you the truth, therefore, I am not this ego that persuades me to believe that I am smaller or bigger than someone else. I am what I am. I simply ‘am’!

I am not this hands that write this essay, for it is just a small part of this most complicated and complex entity, my body. I am not this eye, for it often sees things that do not exist and make me believe that they do and it does not see things that truly exist – such as God! I am not this nose that has now almost forgotten how to cherish the beautiful fragrance of flowers. I am not this limbs that often walk the path of, or perform, adversity. I am perhaps not what ‘I’ am.

In reality I am the innocence, creativity, satisfaction, love, detachment, forgiveness and integration. But this “I” is not any one of them.

I am a bundle of responsibility. I am a son who needs to fulfill the dreams of my parents who bartered their sweats to bring me up. I am a going-to-be parent myself, who needs to be responsible like what my parents are. I am a student who needs to (apparently write a CIA) be responsible enough to succeed a course that is pursued. I am a citizen that needs to justify the cost of my motherland. I am an employee who needs to be sincere and loyal. I am everything that this world has made me to be. What about that 'I' that existed even before I came in this earth?

I am primarily the part of the universe in which great things like love exists. I am the undeniable and eternal part and parcel of God the image of which reflects in my heart. Yet my responsibility to make that reflection clear and apparent is basically what “I” am.

I am a human looking for the answer to the question: who I am? Even after answering the question, perhaps I do not know the answer!